Billm2n

I will die for what I believe.

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Dark. by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Dark.

Clouds surround my head as I fight to be normal, Attempting to find my way through all the turmoil, Should I lie and just say I'm ok? Should I end it all and go out with a whimper? So many questions so many feelings, The world is full of hatred and killing, Really hitting the end of the rope, Scratching and clawing for any shred of hope, I cry, I cut, I bleed, I yearn, I search, I need, The other day I really thought about ending it, But as they say it's darkest before the dawn, Get through the dark days and treacherous nights so you can move on, I try to sleep the pain away but my heart aches, I think about my life and all of my many mistakes, How many people try to be real but turn out fake, I'm trying my best to believe in a brighter tomorrow, I will survive and defeat the sorrow, Like a phoenix I will be born again.

Used To by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Used To

You used to caress me while I cried You used to tell me it's ok when I lied Now you're gone and I deserve that I treated you poorly and that's a fact My family loved you I adored you But was always looking for greener grass Even after all these years you hold a piece of me I'm the last thing on your mind that I can see You've got it together You've stormed all of this horrible weather My depression has gotten worse My head is a mess I got cheated on I guess that was for the best Now I know how it feels to have your heart stomped on To have your trust broken I felt powerless But you're no stranger to that You dealt with me for all those years I couldn't be happier for you and your family The smartest thing you ever did was leave me I'm a complete mess My head is a dumpster fire

Gone by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Gone

You've been gone for awhile now I accept that My heart still has a hole but is healed A new person has entered my life They're helped me through all of this strife I still miss when we talked I miss holding you Around you I could let my guard down I could be anything I wanted But I threw that way I buried our love for my own selfish gain You've moved on now had a child A new person to love You never think of me I hope you're happy now You deserve the world given to you I only held you back You bled for me But I still couldn't see That you were always there Just waiting to see if I'd grow up I was too young then A shadow of who I am now If I could go back I'd change how I was Goodbye former lover I'll miss you every single day But this is all my fault for treating you that way

Red by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Red

I am mystified by your eyes, Consumed by your thighs, You're gorgeous from head to toe, Anywhere with you I would go, You always smell so nice, Your love takes me to new heights, Your body heat keeps me warm on cold nights, Your laugh murders Me, You make me feel happy and free, You're last man mistreated you, Broke your heart left you blue, I'm gonna glue you back, Love you with all my heart, That's just the start, I'll walk you down the aisle, Do my best to make you smile, I'll give you my All, Always catch you before you fall, I Love you Joyce with all my heart, Don't break it please I'm easily broken, I will love you until my last word

Wonder by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Wonder

I wonder if you think of me, I'd be lying if I said I didn't think of you, Every day I regret the mistake I made, Everything we could have had, Thrown all away, All because I never listened to what you had to Say, Does it ever get better? Will the pain ever stop? It's a constant and crippling, I can't smile I can't be Happy, Determined to always feel shitty, I miss your face and your giggles, Your don't give a crap attitude, My eyes are out of tears, I have to buck up and face my fears, I won't be able to kiss you again, Even at least be your friend, You rightfully hate my guts, You blocked me from your life, Never thought I'd ever write thi

Motionless by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Motionless

Laying here thinking of what I've done, The helpless man I've become, Ashamed of who I am, Never to be happy, Always to feel misery, Bleeding just to feel, Never knowing what is real, The love I feel is empty, I sit here motionless, Contemplating my actions, Waiting for my reactions, They never come, I'm dead inside, Doomed to live a forever emotionless ride, I've fought so hard to only believe in myself, There is no room for a god in my heart, I would never let one in, There is already enough pain in the world neglected, So god's love will always be rejected, I know I wanna believe that there is still hope, But sadly there is no hope for me,

Tears by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Tears

Tearing at my arms waiting for the blood to flow, Pain is all I've become to know, My heart is jumpy and empty, Constantly feeling alone, Gotta do something quick, I'm on the edge, I've came so close the last couple of days, To just ending it all, Just waiting for myself to fall, Did I ever really care, I'm slowly becoming aware, I never did, I'm just a silly kid, Can't make decisions, Can't do anything right, I'm losing this fight, Hurting those who try to help, I need to be alone, I've got no time for happiness, I live minute by minute, Looking for the light at the end of the tunnel, I had it then I lost it, I always mess it all up, Stay aw

Devastation by Billm2n, literature

My Fall by Billm2n, literature

Literature

My Fall

Bashing my head against the wall, Fearing the fall, Trying to forget it all, Tell me it'll be ok, That's all I need, No just go away I can't make up my mind, I feel like I need you all the time, Though you are my demise, The reason for all my lies, I need your touch, But it's too much, Sometimes I'd rather die, Than look you in the eye, Sometimes you are my light, The reason I get up an fight, This battle in my head will never end, The feelings take over, I'm sick of this emotional roller coaster, The blood hits the floor, I can't take it anymore, You were my rise, Now my fall, I don't know if you ever cared at all, Leaving me breathless, My

Dad? by Billm2n, literature

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Dark. by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Dark.

Used To by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Used To

Gone by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Gone

Red by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Red

Wonder by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Wonder

Motionless by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Motionless

Tears by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Tears

Devastation by Billm2n, literature

My Fall by Billm2n, literature

Literature

My Fall

Dad? by Billm2n, literature

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Red by Billm2n, literature

Literature

Red

Serial Killer Named Love by SketchPaper, literature

Literature

Serial Killer Named Love

Love kills the heart of one who once had such a simple soul, Its scythe so easily carves into the organ like a butcher knife to raw meat This soul bleeds out to Love, And Love does not care When it seeks your pain of your heart Love dresses in a red, silk robe, Seeming to be so delicate and delightful as a voluptuous rose, And there is a hood attached, draping over its head, Love hides its face in secretivity, leaving only a mystery, Yet for when its face is shown- You see the face of a death that kills you, Yet you don't see an engraved tombstone But you notice a painstaking rock inside your chest Love embraces you with intertwining arms

Deviation Spotlight

.44 by Billm2n, literature

Literature

.44

My dreams turn into nightmares when I arise, The tears start pouring from my eyes, I saw you and I held you only to be ripped away, But now to start another monotonous day, I struggle to find happiness in a dark world, Without you in my arms I'll lay here my body curled, All I can see is your face, Helping to bring light to a hopeless place, Please let me sleep forever, All I want to do is hold her, I close my eyes shut clutching that .44, My tears streaming down my face hitting the floor, Now I can be with her forever more.

.44

Billm2n

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About Billm2n

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Artist // Student // Literature

Aug 22
United States
Deviant for 12 years
www.youtube.com/user/billm2n?feature=mhee
He / Him

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My Bio

My pain shows in my art and on the off chance that I'm happy that shows too.
Link to buy my book.

Support me by donating to my paypal: www.paypal.com/cgi-bin/webscr?…

Xbox One: MotionlessPanic

Twitter: twitter.com/YoBillm2n

Steam: Brickowski

Favourite Visual Artist

Cawissles

Favourite Movies

The hangover, all the Transformers.

Favourite TV Shows

Family Guy,Gravitation, Mythbusters, and My Little Pony(Proud Brony)

Favourite Bands / Musical Artists

The Paramedic,Falling in reverse, Escape the fate, and The Ghost Inside

Favourite Books

Dreamcatcher

Favourite Writers

Stephen King

Favourite Games

Call of duty, and League of legends, and Terraria

Favourite Gaming Platform

PC or Ps3

Tools of the Trade

My mind, body, and soul

Other Interests

Aspiring pro gamer.

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Billm2n

Dec 24, 2019

Bleeding

2 min read

I'm lying here bleeding My heart is on the floor Yet you head for the door I scream out in agony Wishing you would save me My friend's tell me to let you go They say you're just a ho But you're with it You're worth every bit I need comfort I need to be held My head is jumbled and crazy My depression has made me even more lazy My tears make it hard to see I fall apart when I think of what you did to me You broke my heart But yet I still can't leave I have a fear of being alone I'm a literal punching bag Even still I need you You help block out the pain You shelter me from the rain Though you cheated on me I'm still here Why I honestly don't know I just have a fear of being alone I need to be saved from myself I've never been a fan of suicide But it sounded pretty good the other day But you made me stay You held my arm Promised you'd never hurt me again No clue if I believe you It's honestly all I got I have to hold on to the hope That'll you mean what you say So I can live to see

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Billm2n

Sep 21, 2016

Doing commisions!!!

0 min read

I'm opening up commissions. I will write a poem on mostly any topic as long as it's serious commissions are 200 points you can find all the info on my profile. Thanks again for all the support. :) I'm opening commissions to help pay to publish my book.

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Billm2n

Jul 13, 2015

Go Fund Me! (If you want)

0 min read

I'm looking for help in the promotion of my new book and new computer. I really appreciate anyone who helps the only thing I can offer in return in poetry so if you donate let me know by commenting here or sending me a note with a subject. :) http://www.gofundme.com/xq3u8js

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Profile Comments 544

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Happy Birthday.

Happy Birthday, Austin~!!! I hope you have a great day!

KatyAmlie

Sep 24, 2016

Found you on loveTWITTER ! and watched! :33

Just opened my twitter account, would be cool if you could join me at twitter.com/catazarch ^o^

4V3NG3D-S3V3NF0LD

Aug 22, 2016

Happy Birthday, bro~! ^^

Happy early Birthday

Holy shit bro. Your poems are deep and describe how I feel 99% of the time. They always find a way to make me emotional and I end up crying. You are the most amazing person I know. You are my idol for poetry ;-; I envy your epic skills.

Billm2n

Apr 30, 2016

Glad to hear that really means a lot to me. Had a big smile on my face when I read that.